October 21, 2008 – Laredo, Texas
Matt Hardy comes to the ring for a chat. He focuses in on Mark Henry, because that’s who WWE was clearly hoping the fans would vote for at the PPV. Hardy knows the WWE Universe won’t vote for Henry, but he says he’s voting for him anyway because he wants that fight. That brings out FInlay and Evan Bourne, who both say that if they win the vote then they’ll also win the title. Henry comes out and lets us know there will be the predictable triple threat main event among the potential challengers. I will say, Finlay calling Bourne “Bourneswoggle” because of his height was pretty funny. Henry forgetting his lines was also funny.
Jack Swagger def. Brett Badery
The commentators and ring announcer both mispronounce Badery’s name. This was just another Swagger squash. He wins with the gutwrench powerbomb in 1:11. After the match, Todd Grisham interviews Swagger in the ring about his comments about Tommy Dreamer. Swagger blows it off. N/A
The Miz & Morrison are interviewed about Cyber Sunday. Miz says that the Republicans will lose because they didn’t have him on the ticket. I would have watched a Miz vs. Joe Biden debate with some enthusiasm. Speaking of which, it’s indescribably satisfying to notice that Matt Striker had been cowed and stopped talking about politics in the weeks before Barack Obama was elected POTUS, probably because the brass was worried about FCC violations.
Shad Gaspard def. The Miz
This could piss people off, but Mauro Ranallo forces random pop culture references into his commentary in the exact same way that Striker used to. No wonder Ranallo has been irritating me so much lately. Oddly, it’s Grisham’s commentary here that’s racist, and Striker is the one telling him to stop. Gaspard’s punches are some of the worst I’ve ever seen, and I’ve seen so much wrestling. Those punches aside, this was decent enough for what it was and didn’t overstay its welcome. Morrison interfered in full view of the referee, giving Gaspard the disqualification win at 4:54. At the PPV, the fans voted for a tag match between these two teams over a tag title match between Legacy and Kofi Kingston & CM Punk. Wrestling fans are their own worst enemies. **
Mark Henry def. Finlay and Evan Bourne {Triple Threat Match}
This was sloppy and boring and way too long. There was also only really one spot that involved all three guys at the same time. Also, Finlay’s streak of getting the crowd deeply behind him ended with total silence here. The last ten seconds were fun though, as Finlay hit Henry with the shillelagh, only to be hit by Bourne’s Meteora, and then Bourne pinned Henry with the Shooting Star Press at 10:37. *¾
Bourne wound up winning the vote at Cyber Sunday in a landslide, so let’s take a look at that.
October 26, 2008 – Phoenix, Arizona
Matt Hardy def. Evan Bourne {ECW Championship Match}
The bell rang before the referee called for it to ring, and the looks of death that the referee shoots the timekeeper in the first moments of the match are hilarious. Now I can’t stop looking at the referee. I’m broken. This match was reasonably entertaining. I don’t think the crowd ever brought that Bourne could win the title, and it seemed like every female in the crowd would only react when Hardy was in control. The match did feature a Torbellino from Bourne, and I love whenever he brings Dragon Gate moves in to his matches. Hardy won with the Twist of Fate at 11:01. ***