August 29, 2018 – Los Angeles, California
The men of the Worldwide Underground are gearing up for Johnny Mundo’s wedding. The boys have a surprise for Mundo, his old tag team partner Joey Wrestling (Mercury)! That’s pretty dope. He’s the new best man, replacing PJ Black, which means Ricky Mundo is demoted to ring bearer. He also gets his air guitar taken away. The doll reminds Ricky to keep his vow to her.
Jake Strong def. Drago
Matt Striker is making Wedding Singer jokes in 2018 and Famous B is still on ring announcer duty. What is Strong’s gimmick exactly? He doesn’t really lean into the MMA or mat wrestling thing except for his finish. He’s just another big man in a company that has several more interesting ones. Strong wins with the anklelock at 4:49 after a pedestrian match with one big spot. Strong tries to break Drago’s ankle using his nunchucks after the match, but Aerostar makes the save. **
XO Lishus def. Jack Evans {No Mas Match}
I was enjoying this until Ivelisse came out to attack Evans. Why is the babyface’s friend coming out to attack the heel when the babyface is doing a fine job handling himself? She gets taken out immediately, so was the point just to make her look bad? That diversion gave way to a pretty solid exchange on the mat. Joey Ryan came out to ask Evans to take it easy on Lishus in an appearance that made way more sense. Lishus won moments later with a cross armbreaker at 11:15. I liked that this match relied more on submissions, rather than the previous No Mas match which focused on blood and blunt force. The finish was very flat, and didn’t feel like enough comeuppance for Evans, but most of the match was good. Ryan aligns with Lishus & Ivelisse after the match. ***
Evans crawls to the back, where Black tells him to put on his tux though it’s clear he won’t be making it to the wedding. Ricky asks to take Evans’ place as a groomsmen because the rings are stupid, but a nervous Johnny berates him and leaves him out of his list of best friends.
It’s wedding time. Famous B is the minister. Black is the bestish man. Wrestling is the bestest man. Johnny is the Mayor of Slamtown. Cheerleader Melissa (is Mariposa dead?) is a bridesmaid. Beautiful Brenda is the maid of honor. Taya is the First Lady of Slamtown. Striker says she looks like Adrian Street because he’s just a complete piece of garbage. Fuck him forever and never believe there’s he’s misunderstood. Meanwhile, the doll demands that RIcky release Matanza Cueto from the freezer he’s locked in. Back in the ring, Antonio Cueto offers Mundo a giant platter of tacos as a wedding gift. This is all so delightfully white trash, and it totally leans into it. Taya and Johnny exchange vows and then Ricky comes out with the doll and the rings, and then Johnny tells Ricky to get out of the ring because he’s not in the wedding party. I don’t think he understands how wedding parties work. Before Famous B can pronounce them man and wife, he sees Mantanza and runs away. Matanza beats up every man and woman in the ring (well, Brenda just faints), and even Famous B gets slammed while in his wheelchair. Black has the honor of getting put through the taco table. Ricky laughs and Taya bleeds as Matanza suplexes Johnny through the another taco table. The crowd doesn’t reach to much of the Matanza stuff, with the exception of Taya making a brief comeback before getting hit with the Wrath of the Gods and a chokeslam through her wedding cake. Nobody gets sacrificed to the gods, so they kind of got off easy. Quiet crowd aside, I liked this more than most wrestling weddings.