Lucha Underground: The Machine

February 24, 2016 – Los Angeles, California

The show starts with Vampiro encouraging Pentagon to do whatever it takes to get what he wants, and to not even let Catrina stop him. 

Jack Evans def. PJ Black
Evans ripped on Drago in a promo before the match. Drago showed up later and accidentally cost Black the match (he got misted and Evans got a backslide at 3:52). The little match was fun, if super short. *¾ \

Famous B wants you to call his hotline so he can make you famous too. You don’t want to die and be forgotten!

King Cuero def. Killshot
This was a reasonably well executed back and forth match that ended when Cuerno hit the Thrill of the Hunt at 5:29. After the match, he goes for the Kill of the Hunt but Fenix makes the save. **¼ 

Texano def. Mr. Cisco {Gauntlet Match}
Texano is running the gauntlet here. He won in ten seconds with a superkick. N/A

Texano def. Cortez Castro {Gauntlet Match}
Texano took a bit of offense, no-sold the damage, then picked up the win at 2:58 with a Ligerbomb. This was fine for what it was. **

Chavo Guerrero def. Texano {Gauntlet Match}
This was all punches and kicks until Castro used the bull rope to hold Texano down and give Guerrero the winning pin at 2:37. Overall the gauntlet was fine in story, but as matches it was nothing. *½ 

At the new Temple, it becomes clear that Dario Cueto is luring men into their deaths so that Matanza can be ready to go back to the old Temple for war. He tells Black Lotus how Matanza protected him from his abusive mother. The red bull statue that Cueto kept on his desk was the weapon Matanza used to kill their mother. It was the day Cueto learned how much he loved violence. Black seems disturbed. Meanwhile, Pentagon demands a match with Prince Puma from Catrina. She’s still mad about what he did to Mil Muertes so they fight. Pentagon is about to break her arm, but she teleports away and grants the match. She warns him that touching her was a big mistake. I love this shlock. 

Johnny Mundo def. Cage
This episode’s name reminds me of sequels that have the same title as the original movie, like Fast & Furious or The Final Destination. Last year they did an episode called Johnny Mundo vs. The Machine, and now we have this. It turned out to be a pretty dope match, wherein Cage was strong enough to power through all of Mundo’s cheating, while Mundo was able to counter most of Cage’s power moves. In the end, Taya ran out to distract the referee after Cage hit Weapon X, then gave Mundo a pip that he used to win at 7:54. ***¼ 

Cuenro doesn’t want to be the Gift of the Gods Champion anymore, as it’s making him a target. So he’s cashing in his title shot next week. Catrina reminds him that they had a deal, and she’s booking him against Fenix again next week for Cuerno’s title in a ladder match. Cuerno is pissed, but that’s what happens when you get in bed with dead people. I guess their deal was that he’d hold the title to keep anyone from getting to Muertes, but I’m not sure what Cuerno was getting out of it. Maybe he was set to get a shot after Muertes healed? But didn’t he win the title before Muertes got hurt?