Lucha Underground: Family First

June 21, 2017 – Los Angeles, California

Marty Martinez loses his cool as he spies on Melissa Santos and Fenix flirting outside the Temple. 

Cage def. Vinny Massaro {First Round Match}
Massaro is a mess, covered in stains. Cage continues to wrestle without the gauntlet, making me wonder why they bothered having Councilman Delgado say that Cage never takes it off. I figured the matches were filmed before the vignettes on this show. The crowd gets really excited when Massaro gets a takedown, but the fat man makes the mistake of going for the gauntlet and Cage makes him pay for it. Cage hits the Drill Claw for the win at 3:29. He bashes Massaro’s face open with the gauntlet after the match. *½ 

We get another Australian-narrated hype video for the Johnny Mundo vs. Rey Mysterio match. I wonder if they’ll do these every week until their late-August match. That’d certain make the fight seem like a big deal. 

Marty Martinez def. Saltador {First Round Match}
We haven’t had a weirdo vs. weirdo match in a while. These Rabbit Tribe matches are too long. Saltador had a couple funny spots, but he never had a chance at winning and that made this feel drawn out. Martinez could have done his stalker nonsense toward Santos in a shorter match. He hits a double underhook facebuster for the win at 7:24. Santos sounds very disappointed when announcing him as the winner. **

Mascarita Sagrada is traning in the locker room when Paul London and Mala Suerte ask him to lead the Rabbit Tribe again. Sagrada is still out on the idea. London thinks he’s a god. Elsewhere, Martinez rambles in front of his Santos obsession wall. He has some of her hair too. I hate this so so so much, but I guess I’m supposed to. Mariposa shows up and criticizes this distraction. Once she wins tonight they’ll fight in the next round, and she’s going to hurt him. It’s implied that these two siblings used to bone each other and that Martinez wants to bring Santos into the family so he can bone her too, so now this show has that vibe going for it. Nope, don’t want it, don’t think wrestling can handle it. This isn’t Boardwalk Empire. 

Pindar def. Mascarita Sagrada {First Round Match}
This turned out to be pretty fun, as Sagrada seemed to be overcoming the massive challenge of beating Pindar and dealing with Kobra Moon’s interference. I don’t know if we needed Sagrada just slapping the crap out of Moon’s face, but he’s a little person so I guess it’s not that disturbing. Pindar hits him with a big ol’ facebuster shortly after that for the win at 5:56. **½ 

Fenix def. Mariposa {First Round Match}
I have for the most part really not enjoyed the first round of this tournament. It feels like the brackets were seeded but then the matches didn’t reflect that the top prospects were facing the bottom ones. Mariposa has been probably the biggest disappointement after a really impressive build up before her debut. She’s been threatening and impressive against nobody except Sexy Star. Here, Fenix has a touch of trouble, but the match is just dull. Thank god the right person went over. Fenix won in 5:50 with the Fenix Driver. After the match, Martinez runs out to stir up trouble with Fenix and Santos, but Fenix gets the better of him. **¼