Okay, let’s put this puppy to bed and look at WWE’s attempt to squeeze the last few dollars out of the nostalgia-fueled legacy of ECW.
June 11, 2006 – New York, New York
Rob Van Dam def. John Cena {WWE Championship Extreme Rules Match}
From the second One Night Stand. This was really cool. The crowd was more into this than anything else on the show, and that’s saying something. Cena was in control for a LOT of the match, falling behind whenever he let the crowd get to him. It was cool to see him wrestle heel, as he knew that he was in big trouble in front of this audience. The action was real fun, though RVD certainly didn’t come out of it looking very strong. He got his ass kicked through a lot of this, which is fine as he was a babyface fighting from underneath. Needing Edge and Paul Heyman to help him win didn’t do him a lot of favors, but knowing that he didn’t end up holding the title takes some of the edge off of that sting. RVD won at 20:38, and by virtue of winning this title and bringing it to the ECW brand he also was crowned ECW Champion. ****
July 4, 2006 – Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Big Show def. Rob Van Dam {ECW Championship Extreme Rules Match}
From WWE ECW #4. Getting arrested for possession sucks, but the crowd chants for marijuana anyway even though it’s the reason their boy is losing his title because he can’t keep his habit under control. Now, did we need more than fifteen minutes of Show just brawling? Probably not. They picked up some steam for the finish, which indeed saw Heyman turn on RVD, but there was a lot of boring stuff leading up to it. They really should have utilized the stipulation more, and someone must have thought the same because next week that’s exactly what Show did. Show won at 18:18. **¾
December 3, 2006 – Augusta, Georgia
Bobby Lashley def. Big Show, Test, Hardcore Holly, Rob Van Dam, and CM Punk {ECW Championship Elimination Chamber Match}
From the second December to Dismember. The first fifteen minutes of this match were pretty boring, a few interesting spots aside. Then they almost had an interesting story going, with the bad guys isolating Lashley and making him run a gauntlet to get to the title. But then they spoiled it by having Test turn on Holly. That made Holly’s presence in the match totally useless. From a qualitative standpoint this wasn’t the garbage main event I was expecting, but from a storytelling standpoint they stepped on their own toes a few times here. Case in point, the final segment between Lashley and Show started off dramatically and interestingly, and then they lumbered through a drag of a finish. Lashley won at 24:42. **¼
April 29, 2007 – Atlanta, Georgia
Vince McMahon, Shane McMahon & Umaga def. Bobby Lashley {ECW Championship Handicap Match}
From the ninth Backlash. This angle was mostly built up on Raw, but it had a cup of coffee on ECW and it’s for the ECW title so here it is. The match started out pretty strong, with Lashley dispatching Shane and Umaga but having a hard time getting his hands on Vince. Then the heels took over and we had to believe that Shane could control Lashley for an extended period of time and it fell apart. After what felt like a lifetime of that kind of crap, Vince finally gets in the ring and wins the title at 15:45 after a belt shot from Shane and two Superfly Splashes from Umaga. *
June 3, 2007 – Jacksonville, Florida
Bobby Lashley def. Vince McMahon {ECW Championship Street Fight}
From the third One Night Stand. McMahon had his son and Umaga with him here, so the only difference between this and the last two PPV matches for this title was that the bad guys didn’t have to tag in and out. This was very boring. It was basically your typical (what would be a) post-match beatdown that went on way too long. I’ll hand it to Joey Styles though, when Lashley finally took control and put a beating on McMahon, he did a good job reciting the reasons that Lashley would be pissed. I think they were banking on Shane’s two big spots making up for the lack of action in this, but it very much did not. Lashley won at 12:23. *¾
June 24, 2007 – Houston, Texas
Johnny Nitro def. CM Punk {ECW Championship Match}
From Vengeance: Night of Champions. Joey Styles wrongly says this is Punk’s first world title match, but this was before WWE was acknowledging the indies. The finish here was a little flat, but they did a really great job of getting the crowd to forget that Benoit wasn’t there (the crowd really really wanted Benoit to be there) through force of hard work alone. Really solid stuff here. Nitro won at 8:00. ***
September 4, 2007 – Cincinnati, Ohio
CM Punk def. John Morrison {ECW Championship Match}
From WWE ECW #65. This was easily their best match so far, building nicely off of their PPV matches and keeping the action tighter and more interesting. Morrison’s “cheating” from SummerSlam, coupled with Punk’s savvy and bait, led to the title win for Punk at 16:21. That karmic justice is cathartic and one of the best things about wrestling. I’d be down to watch them go one more time, knowing that they have this kind of action in them. ***½
January 22, 2008 – Charlottesville, Virginia
Chavo Guerrero def. CM Punk {ECW Championship No Disqualification Match}
From WWE ECW #85. Edge & Guerrero were now bonded through Vickie Guerrero. The shorter run time (around 6 minutes vs. over 10) and the hot crowd made this an easier ride than their previous matches, but then Edge ran in and gave this the most unsatisfying ending possible. Guerrero won at 6:03. What a drag. Oh, and Guerrero also eliminated Punk from the Royal Rumble a few days later. There were no ECW-brand matches on that show. **½
March 30, 2008 – Orlando, Florida
Kane def. Chavo Guerrero {ECW Championship Match}
From WrestleMania XXIV. Kane hit the chokeslam at the opening bell and won the title in eleven seconds. He’d won a battle royal earlier in the night to earn this shot. Out of the frying pan and into the fire (as far as crappy champions go) so to speak. I’m sorry, and they should also be sorry. N/A
June 29, 2008 – Dallas, Texas
Mark Henry def. Kane and the Big Show {ECW Championship Triple Threat Match}
From the second Night of Champions. Weirdly enough, this match had fewer ECW wrestlers in it than the previous two, so Henry winning was sort of a given. Tazz and Mike Adamle take over on commentary, and I just can’t understand why Ross and Foley spoke over the last match. They built the ECW announce table and had their commentators on the show, so why not have them handle more matches? If it’s just because Adamle was terrible, I actually understand. “Kane is still out here in front of our broadcast thing,” said Adamle, almost to my disbelief. Hearing him defend his decision to call it a thing and not a table when Tazz calls him on it is especially jarring. This guy was about to get a microphone every week on Raw. Anyway, the match was trash. I went into it with high hopes because Kane had been performing well in recent weeks on TV, but holy crap this was so bad. It was awkward as hell, utilized the laziest of triple threat match tropes, and had a crummy finish as Henry popped in out of nowhere to splash Kane for the win and the title at 8:19 after Kane had tossed Show off the turnbuckle. Blah. ¾*
September 7, 2008 – Cleveland, Ohio
Matt Hardy def. Mark Henry, the Miz, Chavo Guerrero, and Finlay {ECW Championship Scramble Match}
From the 11th Unforgiven. In WWE, Championship Scrambles are 20-minutes matches, featuring five wrestlers who enter at five-minute intervals, wherein pinfalls can happen multiple times resulting in interim champions, and the winner at the end of the 20-minute time limit is the official champion. The commentators irritatingly kept saying that Henry had an 80% chance of losing the title, but that presumes that all five guys had even odds going into the match, which is never the case. Leave the numbers to Scott Steiner, you tools. Miz and Hardy started and couldn’t go five minutes without a chinlock. I hate 2008 Miz so much. Chavo came out next and immediately becomes the interim champ with a Frog Splash on Hardy. Hardy claimed that honor a few minutes later with the Side Effect on Guerrero. Henry came out a minute later and fought off everyone to pin Guerrero and become interim champ. Todd Grisham says the quiet part out loud, “Mark Henry has taken the life out of not only his opponents, but this crowd.” Finlay came out last and brought some much-needed fire to the match. He and Hardy dumped Henry and then Finlay pinned Hardy to become the interim champ with the Celtic Cross. With three minutes left in the match, things started to pick up. Hardy hit the Twist of Fate on Miz to become interim champ. The rest of the match was technically sound, with Hardy having to keep his wits about him to keep Henry from pinning anyone. It got a little repetitive, but it made sense and the crowd was invested so I can’t fault it too much. I can fault that seventeen minutes of the match were pretty boring. Hardy won the title thanks to his opponents’ incompetence at 20:00. **½
January 13, 2009 – Sioux City, Iowa
Jack Swagger def. Matt Hardy {ECW Championship Match}
From WWE ECW #136. They went to two commercial breaks here, which was pretty rare on this show. This was alright, but it felt like something was missing. Both guys worked hard, but they told the beginning and the end of a story without the middle. Swagger as the new champion didn’t get much of a reaction, but Hardy’s reign was dead in the water at this point so it was good to move the belt over. Swagger won at 10:17 (shown) with the gutwrench powerbomb. **¾
April 26, 2009 – Providence, Rhode Island
Christian def. Jack Swagger {ECW Championship Match}
From the 11th Backlash. Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, and Jim Ross are on commentary here and the ring announcer doesn’t give this championship match intros. Kinda weird. Anyway, I could have done without the extended waistlock, but a good deal of the match was quite entertaining. Just short of the quality of their previous title match. Christian knocked Swagger into an exposed turnbuckle and hit the Killswitch for the win at 11:00. ***¼
June 7, 2009 – New Orleans, Louisiana
Tommy Dreamer def. Christian and Jack Swagger {ECW Championship Triple Threat Hardcore Match}
From the inaugural Extreme Rules. This was a fun enough plunder match, but that I think took some of the punch out of Dreamer’s emotional story. The finish felt rather sterile, as Dreamer stopped Swagger from hitting the powerbomb on Christian and then nailed him with a DDT for the win and the title at 9:38. But there weren’t any compelling near falls in any direction, so that’s a serious knock on the match. **¾
July 26, 2009 – Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Christian def. Tommy Dreamer {ECW Championship Match}
From the third Night of Champions. This was a rather sterile version of their TV matches, which is a shame because those were good but needed a finish. This had a finish but needed some motivation. The Philly crowd did not show up for Dreamer either. Maybe they shouldn’t have jobbed him to Kozlov and made him sound like a goof on two episodes of a shitty talk show if they wanted people to get behind him. Christian hit the Killswitch for the win and the title at 8:28. **½
February 16, 2010 – Kansas City, Missouri
Ezekiel Jackson def. Christian {ECW Championship Extreme Rules Match}
From WWE ECW #193, the final episode of the show. Christian outdoes Benjamin’s promo from last week before the match. Ryder’s promised interference happened early and was dispatched quickly. Then Tiffany did the same to Rosa Mendes, which was neat. I think they made a big mistake by leaving it at that. They should have gone all out and combined the previous segment with this one, having all the interconnected issues play out during this plunder brawl. That would have really been in the spirit of the original ECW. As it is, this was a decent enough weapon battle. It got less interesting as it went, and it ended when Regal distracted Christian, allowing Jackson to hit a uranage through a table for the win and the title at 7:42 (shown). **½
And that’s a wrap on this title. Jackson’s reign ended at one day because the championship was deactivated, never to be heard from again, hopefully. ECW was resoundingly crap when it came to in-ring action, be it in its primordial, well-known, or WWE bastardized forms. Sure there were some gems on the undercard, but in a series like this you’ll see very little of that. I suppose I’ll give WCW a try next and hope for the best.